Baby Sister Jen

Baby sister Jen.  Where do I even begin.  You know how a little sister follows her big sister around and wants to be just like her, but might torment her sometimes too - just because she can?  That's Jen.  Jenny-bug, as she is affectionately called in my family, is only 17 months younger than me.  That means, I don't really exist in her world - well I didn't when we were growing up.  Now, I might be a blip on the radar sometimes, mostly when I need something.  When we were growing up she attached herself to Mel.  Most of the time, Mel was ok with this until Jen touched her stuff.  Then it was pandemonium.  "DON'T TOUCH MY STUFF!!!!" was a common scream heard in my house.  Our house was comfortable but small - only three bedrooms.  Luckily, I got my own - I'm not sure I would have survived childhood and adolescence without my safe-haven!  I always wished my parents would let me have a lock on my door, but that never happened.  My parents obviously had a room, which left one room for my sisters.  It was a good size room, not TOO cramped, but many times too close for comfort for the older sister.  I never could figure out why they weren't just best friends all the time.  Mel's friends were always a lot more annoying than Jen ever was, but for some reason the moments of sisterly love were fewer than I would have expected, and somewhat fleeting.  It was usually when my mom had come to the end of her rope with Jen teasing Mel and Mel freaking out about it.  Then, when they realized my mom was seriously ticked, they'd mellow out and hug and say how much they loved each other and it was all cute and adorable.  Or something like that.  Remember, I was the middle child between two drama princesses so I didn't come into play very often.  I didn't mind.  Actually, to be fair, Jen and I had as good of a relationship as we could have, given our personalities and circumstances.  I was always a little bugged that she wasn't a brother, and even more bugged that my parents didn't have one more child so I could have a brother.  Apparently, this bothered me early on as I would ask if Jen was a boy quite a bit.  Then when I figured out she was a girl and wasn't going to miraculously change into a boy, I began to ask, with some frequency, when my parents were going to have another boy?  It seemed only fair.  Now, that I'm older I wonder what would have happened if they had another child and it was another girl.  I wonder if I would have ceased to exist completely.  Probably not, I would have just been institutionalized at a young age.

Jen was pretty cute.  Everyone said Mel was beautiful, I think Jen was cuter.  Keep in mind, I came to this conclusion later in life as I looked back at pictures.  When we were little, I thought they were both hideous gargoyles.  Or screeching harpies, either one.  But I always liked Jen more.  Maybe because we were so close in age, I don't know.  Jen knew how to push Mel's buttons, but at the same time wanted to do everything Mel did.  Jen looked up to Mel a lot, and really Mel provided a pretty good example, except the drama part. That was just plain aggravating.  As Jen grew up she ended up being a good athlete like Mel, but a bit more feminine.  She stuck to dancing, swimming and running and really only did any of them for fun and entertainment, not really to compete.  I thought this was a bit strange since Mel was so ultra-competitive.  Just a slight difference in personality I guess.  Jen was my mom's favorite.  My mom would never admit it, but she absolutely loved Jen  more than Mel and me.  I feel it was because they were SO much alike.  Jen was the miniature version of my mom, and for some reason they just went together.

I guess that brings us back to me...