Chapter 1

I'm Ian. I'm 18, I live in Chandler Arizona. I'm getting ready to graduate from High School. Or at least that's how I would have started my life story 10 years ago. Now, I have a completely different view of things as they are and as they were. I know the old cliche is "hindsight is 20/20" but they're cliches because they're true and repeatable. If I was to define myself back then by how my parents saw me (especially my mom) I would say I was good-looking, popular, and very smart. In fact, I wasn't great looking, or I guess I didn't have much confidence to carry myself in an attractive manner. I don't think I really cared. I was popular, but in a different sort of way. I just got along with everybody, no matter the clique, but only really had a handful of true friends. And I was smart but didn't apply myself in a way that it counted for much. I earned ok grades in school, but again I wasn't really interested in education. Frankly, I wasn't interested in much except hanging out. That's probably the attitude that got me into some pretty crappy places in the last 10 years. And a lot has happened. A lot that I feel is worthy of a parable - the "AZ Boy who could"? No, not so upbeat and inspirational as that, but more like "The laid back kid who grew up"!

Some might be inclined to look at my family upbringing to decipher why I am the way I am. While I am a believer of sorts in the "nurture" over "nature" argument, it can't be all that.